Altar-native Lifestyle

Rosh Hashanah sets the tone for the year. So for all of us who slept late, through prayer, & napped in the pm- may it be a restful, dream filled year!
Such were the great words of the Altar of Chelm.

This past year, as now, many of us have set out on our quest for the Holy Grail. Inspired by the Rosh Hashanah reading of the binding of Isaac, we too wish to journey to the altar in order to make our ultimate sacrifice. Note to self: choose the blade.

There are two types of altars in the Bible: Mizbe'ach and MaTzeivah. The first is made of multiple components and the second of a single stone. It is significant that the last Torah reading before Rosh Hashanah is always Netzvavim (which has the same root as MaTzeivah). In that Parsha, R.Frand notes that the transfer of leadership has the people assembled (netzavim) as a unified one, accepting the new ruler. On Rosh Hashanah we assemble before God as one people unified in our acceptance of the oneness and singular rulership of God.

But why did the Torah elsewhere exhort us NOT to made a MaTzeivah of/for ourselves?" For accepting Divine rule, there, it is necessary to be of singular mind. But in human existence being one or by oneself isn't ideal. Spiritually, a person who is standing still as a single, solid golem-like MaTazeivah, is uni-dimensional. The Torah wants us to be more than that, to always progress, to move forward and not stagnate (That's why Nitzavim is often connected to Vayelech- our leaders mission is to take these intransient obstinate people and move them forward spiritually and socially). We need to strive to higher levels, refine our character, and overcome our baser nature.

Socially, people were not created to live in a vacuum (Hoover or otherwise) or as hermits. Being alone makes one focus only on himself. But when joined with a partner, he would be challenged to be a better person, learn how to give and not be self-centered so that the two could share and enjoy in life's journey. As with Abraham and Isaac, the altar is the test. Which altar we choose for ourselves could very well determine what kind of altar we merit finding.
-

Getting Into The Swing of It?

I'm a thinkin' I hear sum cuntry music a playin'. So are you ready to grab your partner and swing some chicken? KAPPOROS are the square dancing of the frum world, the very mention of it sends fear into the hearts of our fowl friends and any Fred Astaire Dance School grad.

To see old post on the topic, spin you mouse over your head three times, say a few hail Marys and click here.

Questionable Mining

In the bid to land a man, let's be honest, it's really about the rock. Though it may be politically incorrect for women to admit, size does indeed matter. Remember we are speaking of the Rock with a capital 'R'. Many a rocky relationship begins with an inferior setting. Unfortunately, superior diamonds may originate in an all too sketchy source. A woman may overlook the imperfections in the distributer as long as she can outflash her friends and perhaps blind a passing driver. Only when the relationship is on the rocks, does she recognize that she must have been off her rocker to be cut down to size by her fatal flaw, her achilles high-heel, her taste for- conflict diamonds.

The Dynamics of Duo

Singles weekends are like the backdrop of a superhero comic book series. Well drawn, attractive setting and colorful characters. The hero has an objective of paramount importance yet is inevitably met with obstacles that thwart that effort. Epic battles may ensue between Hero and Nemesis, each claiming Just Cause or perhaps Divine Right to reach the targeted Objective. Each of their goals are clear but it remains to be seen whose superpowers of persuasion will ultimately triumph. The irony is how their own Target may play one against the other mercilessly. In truth, the Target herself may be uncertain as to which one to choose. Mixed signals, mixed attention can be like kryptonite to the Man of Steel or worse yet, a cold lake to, well, you get the picture...

Other editions of our saga may feature not just a single adversary but our hero may come upon a den of resistance. Hero's objective may be in-league with a League of Superbeings, each with their unique charm and powers. Sometimes they would emit interference patterns to confuse Hero, perhaps Hero himself is being targeted by a different league member and so they attempt diversionary tactics to redirect his attention away from Objective. Hard core Hero worshipers call it the C-Block. Perhaps Hero himself is conflicted by multiple targets on his radar and he himself sabotages the whole operation by indecision or improper decisive action.

There are times when the League realizes that Objective really needs to be shielded from Hero who is really just a hero in his own mind. Do I hear stalker anyone?

Maybe Objective doesn't object to Hero's advances but what is Objective to do? Can she abandon her pack, her bunk-mates of debauchery, her commitment to stay by their side lest they feel vulnerable and exposed? Does she feel a little on guard because her den-mates are watching? Awkward for Objective and Hero alike. Does Hero interpret this invisible shield between them as disinterest or genuine sticking-with-the-pack behavior? His ego votes for the latter (yeah, you herd me). Maybe hero is misreading her aura or she his intent. Maybe it's just an illusion leading to confusion. How much of life is actually played out in the real world, anyway? Much of it happens only in the mind of the beholder or the one wishing to be held.

Then there is the episode where the writers throw the hero a bone. It just happens by chance that hero is in the right place and for once in his life, really just a freak mishap, he actually says the right thing, and a whole series of circumstances all play out so perfectly that one has to wonder who could believe that this would ever happen in real life. The writers were just fresh out of ideas of malevolent ways to torment the hero in his quest and settled for a simple feel-happy ending. Target acquired! Extremely rare and hardly believable but those are the fantasies we indulge in.

In the majority of cases, though, people are disappointed or someone gets hurt. The hero may fall and only rarely, there will be glorious victory. But don't despair, the saga must continue so expect a sequel where the fallen rise up again. And if not, there's a pill for that.