Gut Reaction

Now I don't know if I believe in life in the great beyond or in communication between that world and ours but something made me stop and think. I was pondering what happened to me shortly after my engagement to be married. I was struck with a bad case of hepatitis of unknown etiology. I was out of commission for a week but sad to say I recovered without learning my lesson. You see, my brother also contracted this nefarious condition just after he proposed as well. He too recovered but not before praying for his release. Until this day, I thought he meant release from the pain of this world during the darkest moments of his illness but in truth he meant release from the bonds of marriage. I was discussing this with a friend who pointed out that he got pneumonia after his sheva brachot and another of his friends developed diabetes at his engagement party.

I'm starting to see a pattern here. Is it a message from beyond, a warning from a higher being as to the cost of this ungodly enterprise? Or perhaps this is a visceral aversion borne out of evolutionary forces against monogamy. Shall I place my eggs in one basket, I ask myself? I'm leaning towards the latter proposal (if I dare say that word in public).

If you survive the gut wrenching warning klaxons and choose not to heed them, doom is on the horizon. One ritual gives a glimpse into your future. When the bride walks seven times around the groom, it symbolizes his impending downfall like that of the walls Jericho after seven circuits. Whether you fall to the warning message or fall for the bride, you will certainly have your kishkas eaten out of you.